


The Suicide of Loki Laufeyson

by pepperpottsgoddessofmischief



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Heartbroken Thor, Loki's suicide, M/M, TW:Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-29
Updated: 2014-08-29
Packaged: 2018-02-15 07:21:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2220471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pepperpottsgoddessofmischief/pseuds/pepperpottsgoddessofmischief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki Loufesyson. A man with a fragile mind who decides that suicide is the best way to escape his problems. Leaving a note for his adoptive brother and new lover is the best thing he can do now but how will Thor react. ThorXLoki at the end in the note.From Thor's point of view. Loki in second chapter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Suicide of Loki Laufeyson

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so my first Thorki. Unfortunately this is currently paused until mid September because I haven't got time to write the second chapter as I'm going back to school! But I'm not giving up on it.  
> Unfortunately I don not own Marvels ideas of Loki and Thor.

"LOKI!"  
Your scream echoes around the empty chasm around you as your younger brother gives up, lets go.  
It only take you moments to feel the flutter in your pocket, for you to notice the paper brushing against your arm. For you to realise he left it for you to find after he had fallen. A letter to you.

His suicide note.

He had planed it all. And it breaks your heart to think he would do something like that. Little Loki who not so many years ago would crawl into your bed in the middle of the night to scare off the nightmares. How do you think of him now, he always used to be so kind, so caring but always a mummy's boy. You were your Fathers son full of ideas of war and bloodshed. But you never wanted to be king. You wanted Loki to have it but your father wouldn't allow it and you now knew why. Odin the great All Father was prejudice. He was the one who had stole Loki as a baby; supposedly to make sure he lived, to give him a better life. But now you know. He was going to use your little brother as a weapon. To show that the Frost Giants and the the people of Asgard could live together. Your Father never told you before and just decided to spring it on you now without any prior warning.

Loki had always had a stronger mind than you, his elder brother, he was always better with words. Deciding to settle his arguments with whit and well thought out answers; where you were angry and war like preferring battles and fighting.  
You're walking back inside the golden palace before your mind registers where you are going. Towards his room.  
It will help you remember him better; his voice, the way he walked, sat, slept, ate, laughed, loved.

He loved his four children dearly; even though he never saw them, all taken away before he could love them, cuddle them. Just given enough time to name them, then they were ripped from his arms. By his own Father.

That was what broke Loki in the end.

His door was shut and locked, but you remember about the door between your two rooms from when you were young children.  
Quickly entering your room you look around to see the mess you left it in. The thin layer of dust on everything from your short time on Earth. The door, in the far corner, is obscured by furniture now because you never thought you would need to use it again; but it was easy enough for you, the God of Thunder, to move.

It's smaller then you remember and you chuckle bitterly at the thought; of cause it was you were both younger then, shorter.  
His room is still the way you remember it; perfect and pristine.

Your throat clenches with an un heard sob when you think of Loki and all his little things. The magic, the green, the gold, his large, loving heart and the caring eyes.

You sit down on his bed and take the letter from your pocket. Your hands are shaking but you manage to break the wax seal on the fold without ripping it.

The letter, written in Loki's neat elegant, is open in front of you and, as you begin to read, Loki's voice is heard in your head.

'Thor,  
I didn't mean for it to end like this. I never meant for anything I did to mean a thing, I was just trying to teach you a lesson. I wish I had thought about my actions now instead if just blundering in trying to change you; you are perfect just the way you are, you don't need changing no matter what anyone says.

If I could go back in time; I would make sure not to hurt you. Before anyone had to bleed. Especially you.  
I'm sorry I attacked you while you were on Midgard. I was jealous and angry that Father trusted you and not me. I do hope I didn't hurt anyone too much.

So it is with a heavy heart that I tell you this I am not actually your brother, Thor. I am a Frost Giant, Laufeys Spawn; the worst of the worst. I should be dead. I wish I was and by the time you read this letter I will be, thankfully.  
Knowing you, you'll be sat in my room just to remember the sound of my voice and remember the nights we spent in there, as children and as adults.  
I love you Thor and I always will. Don't you ever forget that.  
From your dearest,  
Loki'

The tears full up your eyes and the letter becomes unfocused in front of you.  
One thought runs rings around your mind,  
'Why Loki? Why?'


End file.
